


Be My Coach, Yuuri!

by Koane (volleyball_crow)



Series: Be My Coach, Yuuri!, a series [1]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, I take no responsibility for this, M/M, Short, Short One Shot, Viktor is delighted, Yuuri is mortified, Yuuri's life is suffering, and history repeats itself in the form of a young drunk skater, another banquet, what has he done to deserve this, why do these things always happen to him, why won't people forget about that one Banquet already, written in the sleepy haze of 1 AM
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-08
Updated: 2017-02-08
Packaged: 2018-09-22 19:26:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9622217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/volleyball_crow/pseuds/Koane
Summary: At Yuuri's last Banquet before his retirement from competitive figure skating, history repeats itself.





	

Years later, at Yuuri’s last banquet, having announced his retirement (for real, this time! And Viktor-approved, this time!) he and Viktor are casually talking with some sponsor or judge, adulting like responsible people, when Yuuri feels something tug at the bottom of his jacket from behind.

He turns around, catching Viktor’s attention, so they both turn and look down to see one of the younger skaters who just entered the Seniors (came in fifth? sixth?), so drunk he can barely stand up on his own and clearly depending on clinging to Yuuri’s clothes to remain somewhat on his feet. He looks kind of like he’s about to vomit but then his entire face lights up in the sunniest smile when he sees Yuuri looking down at him. There might even be tears.

Yuuri blinks. “Um…?”

His (apparent?) fan gasps in utter adoration. “Oh my god, _Yuuri Katsuki!_ It’s really you! I-I can’t even…! _Is_ it really you? Oh god, oh my god–-I have! I’ve always wanted to tell you! Ah, um! Your step sequences are godly! Your quad flip is the most beautiful thing I’ve seen in this world, I love you so much, please teach meeee…” said worshipful skater babbles, swaying and staring up at Yuuri with stars in his eyes.

“Oh,” Yuuri squeaks, going red.

“ _OH!_ ” gasps Viktor, delighted.

“Viktor, no,” Yuuri chokes out, trying to pry away the hands pulling down his clothes so he can flee to the next country over.

Viktor kneels down and grabs the baby skater’s hands with the biggest smile on his face. “You’re adopted,” he informs their new charge. “We’re adopting him,” he then tells the world at large.

We are _WHAT_. “Viktor, _no_ ,” Yuuri repeats, in the off chance it’ll work this time.

“But Yuuri, he looks _just_ like you!” Viktor, the little devil, whines pitifully while squishing the baby skater's face to his own, the two of them looking up at Yuuri with huge, huge eyes. Their apprentice-to-be is doing his best impression of an abandoned puppy. Viktor's eyes are all manic glee, and his smile gets impossibly bigger. “Remember when–”

“IT’S BEEN NEARLY A DECADE, _LET IT GO ALREADY_.”

**Author's Note:**

> Two weeks later, they're coaching him.


End file.
